As Third Culture Kids grow into Third Culture Adults

Also known as global nomads, Third Culture Kids are becoming an increasing phenomenon as families go global in their quest for better jobs and career choices.

“Third culture kids”, as termed by American sociologist and anthropologist, Ruth Hill Useem “refers to the children who accompany their parents into another society”, after her second year long visit to India with her fellow sociologist/anthropologist husband and three children. In 1993 she wrote: In summarizing that which we had observed in our cross-cultural encounters, we began to use the term “third culture” as a generic term to cover the styles of life created, shared, and learned by persons who are in the process of relating their societies, or sections thereof, to each other. The term “Third Culture Kids” or TCKs was coined to refer to the children who accompany their parents into another society.

With two toddlers and four cases, we packed our most treasured belongings to move to greener pastures, a decade and half ago, as the land of Castles, kilts and bagpipes beckoned. Moving from the busy and bustling city of Mumbai to the sleepy yet surreal Scottish city of Discovery was extremely exciting. One immediately fell in love with the landscape that inspired Robert Burns and understood the idyllic backdrop of Wordsworth’s ‘Daffodils’ and the ‘Solitary Reaper’.

With the honeymoon period over, neighbourhood studied and acquaintances made, started the mammoth task of finding a home and settling in. Simple folk, a friendly cul-de-sac, a little garden and some bright emulsion to replace the rather dull floral wallpaper completed our new abode. Travels to the Highlands, Cairngorms and many a remote Island, the lochs and the Nessie lore are digitally printed and permanently itched into little minds.

Admission into the village school was just a formality and as any form of bullying was brutally intolerated, the kids happily walked to school with their pals. Primary school was all fun and games compared to the rigorous Indian regime and left one to indulge into leisurely past times which included many visits to the park, riding cycle, playing cricket and soccer. The cooler climate and the chilling wind did not dampen the spirit from any form of outdoor activities.

Thanks to technology at its best and the advent of social media, the likes of Skype, Facebook and mobile messaging, grandparents and cousins couldn’t be closer as times zones and different geographies ceased to exist. Hour long conversations, an exchange of recipes and a serious debate on Indian Soaps, culture and tradition was not lost. India, known not only for its famous cuisine or Bollywood but also its customs and traditions, and hence every effort was made to ensure that this invaluable heritage was not lost in the easy ways of the western world.

Culture shock to some and Alice in wonderland to many others, it is indeed a different experience for every family and child and a lot of factors go into its making. Buying a house and making it into a home and being aware that home was not just geographic, rather, it was a place where family and friends thrived, deep down the subconscious reminded that this was temporary. However, the experiences gained and the subtleties in culture differences learnt, is a treasured skill, which non-TCKs will never possess nor understand.

The ambition to excel and a calling from the Swiss Alps, another move and another stage in life, and this time around the teenage son starts his life at university as he gains admission into a prestigious college and course of his choice and moves to the British Capital. With the hope that he will soon grow into a Third Culture Adult and continue with his endeavour to stand by the values that he grew up with, he is a perfect example of a TCK, a prototype citizen of the future in the words of Sociologist, Ted Ward.

Breathtakingly beautiful panoramic views, precision time and travel systems and the painstaking fetish to preserve nature, “If Scotland was heaven, Switzerland is Paradise” as my spouse so aptly described. Relocation, housing, schooling and permits all made easier by professionals, the transition was more mechanical and less emotional even though we were leaving behind the city where the children grew up and rudely reminded that foreigners, we were there and foreigners we will remain, a new chapter begun.

The question of integration and belonging to the society and the international schools are not far behind, for here and here alone does the teenager find the likes of their kind, familiar surroundings, libraries, cafeterias, art studios and a Jazz band to mention a few. With children from over fifty different nationalities, the international schools offer a range of international education accepted by leading universities across the globe. A few eyebrows are raised as our Indian looking daughter with a hint of Scottish accent completes her school application and enters English as her mother tongue and first language.

Although many Third Culture Kids face an identity crisis, split down in the middle, the inability to face or fight and the urge to recoil deeper into the cocoon only to find a temporary and false sense of security, some learn to adapt to new situations quickly and exhibit a chameleon like ability, however they all find it hard to answer a simple question, “Where are you from?” Ironically enough, our teenage daughter honestly believes that home is Scotland and maybe rightfully so, with British schooling and a British passport, this has indeed become her passport country.

A brief visit back to the teenage daughter’s homeland is filled with sheer nostalgia of meeting old friends and visiting familiar joints and the return home filled with long periods of silence. With much resistance we learn to bounce back, stronger than ever before and alas the light at the end of the tunnel is brighter than ever before.

A few years on and among the many choices to make, we start once again as a family, the process of looking for good colleges and universities, the myriad subject choices and a plethora of options, from Third Culture Kids to global nomads armed with skills that textbooks will not teach, in preparation of an international degree and the dream of a global placement thus completing a full circle.